<p><span></span><em>Bachelor Pad</em>'s witty meteorologist reports his weekly predictions to <em>Life & Style</em>.</p>
Hi, it's the Weatherman (a.k.a. Jonathan Novack) from Bachelor Pad! If you remember, Ali sent me home in New York City on this past season of The Bachelorette. If you don't remember, I like long walks on the beach, wearing white jackets and battling with Craig M.
The plan has worked out well for the couples, who just had to prove their chemistry on the dance floor. When trying to dance together in front of the judges, Kovacs and Elizabeth looked like two deer staring into headlights. Natalie messed up her dance with Dave (most likely because she was distracted by Dave's nonshirt shirt), and Kiptyn managed not to step on Tenley's feet, or his own, and pulled out a victory. The judges chose Dave and Nat and off to the live studio audience we went!
I think we all were very happy to work out our issues at the therapeutic finale. Gia and Wes pushed their relationship forward, Kovacs and Elizabeth realized they probably never had one, and Gwen revealed her true age. All was right in the world.
Natalie and Dave split the $250K, which is still a lot of money to spend! That said, I have discovered that my Weatherman skills give me the ability to forecast events related to the show. Here are my predictions for what will happen years down the road with the contestants of the Bachelor Pad:
Natalie will pay off all her student loans, but she'll immediately go into debt when she decides to study to be a doctor.
Kiptyn will marry Tenley, but the marriage will be annulled after they learn Mickey Mouse cannot legally marry people.
Kiptyn will be asked to be a dancer in the new troupe Fly Girls 2.
Michelle will forgive Tenley but hate her again after Tenley tells everyone in the house.
Wes will write a hit song for Gia called "Giving the Rose to Craig M. Don't Come Easy."
Kovacs and Elizabeth will live happily ever after when they realize it was Elizabeth's blond hair that was causing their problems all along.
And I will be at a comedy club near you! For real, Follow me on Twitter: twitter.com/jonathan_novack.
The next sizzling hot show is The Bachelor, which returns in January. Set your DVR!
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