<p><span></span><em>Bachelor Pad</em>'s witty meteorologist reports his weekly predictions to <em>Life & Style</em>.</p>
Hi, it's the Weatherman (a.k.a. Jonathan Novack) from Bachelor Pad! If you remember, Ali sent me home in New York City on this past season of The Bachelorette. If you don't remember, I like long walks on the beach, wearing white jackets and battling with Craig M.
No more complaining that the couples are running the show, because they're all that's left. Now the question is, what's more important: loyalty or strategy? Apparently loyalty. Jesse B. and Peyton are gone, as are most of the other girls. The Cool Kids' plan has worked, and it's down to six. Am I the only one not surprised by how things played out?
Kovacs and Elizabeth's relationship has skyrocketed to new heights of dysfunction. Dave just needs a white horse, and Natalie's dreams are complete (or will a yellow Lambo do?). And Kiptyn better be prepared to get a lot of kisses from Tenley...and probably only kisses.
We look forward to next week, when Bachelor Pad comes to a roaring conclusion. One couple with four left feet will be going home, Dancing With the Stars style. Everyone else who got booted from the Pad will return and we will get to hear how opinions and relationships have changed since seeing everything that went on behind everyone's back. I know I have two or three cents I'd like to share!
That said, I've recently discovered that my weatherman skills give me the specific ability to forecast next week's events on the show, and I'll be here to provide a weekly report. Like any weatherman, I can't guarantee the accuracy of this forecast, so keep that in mind. (Also, you'll find no spoilers here!)
Kovacs proves to Elizabeth he's romantic when he sings a song to her. It's called "I love you, wanna get naked?"
After her talk with Dave, Natalie decides to start a counseling practice. She charges $20 a session.
Kiptyn and Tenley have their first fight. The dispute: Which is better, rocket ships or kisses?
Dave will win the $250,000, but he'll have to immediately pay the insurance deductible for the repairs needed on the Lamborghini.
Everyone in the house returns for the most dramatic Bachelor Pad finale ever! Seriously, ever...it's the first.
All this will happen next week (probably not) on the sizzling show of summer, Bachelor Pad!
Follow the Weatherman at twitter.com/Jonathan_Novack.
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