Fans were sad to see DeShawn Snow leave after the first season of The Real Housewives of Atlanta, but her off-screen life became so dramatic, she was glad the cameras weren’t rolling. In 2012, she told AttaGirl, “Since then, I’ve had a lot of drama in my life, but I’m thankful that the cameras weren’t there!”

In 2010, DeShawn went through a nasty divorce with her husband of 12 years, former NBA player Eric Snow. The former reality star — who has three sons with him: Eric, Darius and Jarren — told the publication that she was trying to move on the best she could. “I’m great. I’m excited to make things happen. I’m definitely moving forward, I’m growing through this. Since I’ve been on the show, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting, a lot of writing, a lot of healing.”

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DeShawn and Eric in December 2008.

All that writing eventually catapulted DeShawn into a children’s book author with her series, Lil Shawnee. Plus, she even shed 30 pounds following her split. “I felt everything was out of my control,” the now 44-year-old told Us Weekly in 2011. “I had no control over anything that was happening in my life and the weight and working out was something I could control.”

She added that her trainer and good friend, Trey Crump, motivated her to push past her relationship troubles. “[When] Trey heard [of my divorce], he texted me and was like ‘Meet me at the gym at 6 a.m.’ He didn’t ask me any questions, we just worked out. That was his way of getting me out of bed and then once I started, I just got consistent.”

These days, it appears the Bravo alum enjoys spending time wither her kids — based on her social media — and sharing messages of positivity with her fans. “All of my projects are basically to empower and encourage young women,” she told Us. “The hardest thing in life is to believe that things happen for a reason. You can’t be a victim, you have to be a victor — press through it — and know that success is the best revenge.”