Jessie J announced she suffered a devastating pregnancy loss in an emotional statement before she was set to perform a show in Los Angeles, California.
“Yesterday morning, I was laughing with a friend saying ‘Seriously though, how am I going to get through my gig in L.A. tomorrow night without telling the whole audience I am pregnant?'” the “Bang Bang” singer, 33, captioned a photo showing herself holding up a Clear Blue pregnancy test on Wednesday, November 24.
“By yesterday afternoon, I was dreading the thought of getting through the gig without breaking down … After going for my third scan and being told there was no longer a heartbeat,” she continued her message on Instagram. “I feel like I have no control of my emotions. I may regret posting this. I may not. I actually don’t know. What I do know, is that I want to sing tonight. Not because I’m avoiding the grief or the process, but because I know singing tonight will help me. I have done two shows in two years and my soul needs it. Even more today.”
Just hours after sharing the announcement on Instagram, the musician went on to perform an emotional two hour-long performance at The Hotel Cafe in Los Angeles, California.
“I know some people will be thinking she should just cancel it,” the United Kingdom native explained. “I want to be honest and true and not hide what I’m feeling. I deserve that. I want to be as myself as I can be at this moment. Not just for the audience but for myself and my little baby that did its best. I know myself and I know I would talk about it on stage because that’s who I am. So instead of a tearful emotional speech trying to explain my energy.”
Jessie, who revealed her split from boyfriend Max Pham after seven months of dating in October 2021, told fans she decided to have a baby “on her own.”
“Because it’s all I’ve ever wanted and life is short,” she concluded. “To get pregnant was a miracle, and an experience I will never forget, and I know I will have again. I’m still in shock, the sadness is overwhelming. But I know I am strong, and I know I will be OK. I also know millions of women all over the world have felt this pain and way worse. I feel connected to those of you I know and those of you I don’t. It’s the loneliest feeling in the world. So, I will see you tonight L.A. I may crack less jokes, but my heart will be in the room.”
Jessie’s statement comes nearly three years after she opened up about her struggles to conceive before performing her song “Four Letter Word” in London.
“I was told that I couldn’t have children, and it’s OK, I’m going to have children, trust me. When the doctor told me, my reaction was, ‘Oh hell nooooooo,'” Jessie sang out to the cheering crowd, having since revealed that she has adjusted her diet and lifestyle in hopes of one day welcoming a son or daughter of her own.
Alongside her latest statement, Jessie shared a powerful quote, which read, “Sometimes love won’t be enough to make it work, and that’s OK. It doesn’t mean that you’ve failed.”