When you were a little girl playing with your Barbie, you thought she was really pretty, right? Sometimes you even wished Hunky McHunkerson Ken was your real-life boyfriend and that you lived happily ever after in the Barbie Dream House, right?
But, ya know, you grew up, and that faded. While Barbie will always have a perfect “life,” you wanted to live your own. Pat yourself on the back because there’s a 16-year-old girl who did the exact opposite.
Lolita Richi is the latest young woman with a desire to look exactly like a piece of boob-tastic plastic.
With a 20-inch waist and a pair of humongous breasts, Lolita, who hails from Kiev in the Ukraine, claims she’s achieved her look WITHOUT surgery, dieting or Photoshop. Yea… Doctor Barbie, Fitness Barbie and Editor Barbie are likely calling BS on this one.
"I think I've achieved this image better than anyone else," she tells Metro U.K., obviously calling out those two other Human Barbies Alina Kovalevskaya and Valeria Lukyanov, who are also from the Ukraine. (Real talk: What the freakity freak is in the water in this area?)
"I'm the ultimate vamp woman. I haven't even heard of Valeria Lukyanov."
BATTLE OF THE BAAAARBIES! Ladies, ladies…don’t you know Skipper, Stacie and Chelsea are all still available?
"People have openly told me that they're jealous of me and how good I look," Lolita said. "All of the boys at school fancy me as well but I don't like any of them. They are not to my taste."
Forget the boys at school; you’ve got two Human Kens sitting around (between surgeries, of course), girl. Pick your poison.