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Jordan Kimball Recaps ‘Small, Vicious’ 3-on-1 Date This Week on ‘Bachelor’: It ‘Has No Oomph to It’
Welcome to Life & Style’s weekly recap of ‘s season of with fan-favorite, ! Jordan rose to fame as the gold speedo-clad “pensive gentleman” on ‘s season of , and continued to capture fans’ hearts on seasons 5 and 6 of . Each week, he’ll be spilling his (very) honest thoughts and opinions on Peter, his contestants, and all of the drama that goes down in season 24 exclusively here at Life & Style!
There are six women left for Peter to send home, and he looks absolutely miserable. He was not ready for this, straight up. The exhaustion in his face is tough for me to watch and cheer on. He’s questioning everyone and everything and seems to be more than paranoid. Has he been honest with himself? Is he ready? Go get some rest, buddy.
Hannah Ann has been quiet lately, and Kelley has been unfazed. Madison doesn’t say much, just smiles, but Kelsey has been vocal along with Natasha and Victoria F. It’s a split house. Who is here for Peter? What does Peter want? Maybe more clarity, but how will he get it? I hope hometowns help and the right talks take place tonight.
Madison’s One-on-One
Madison gets another one and one, and I’m trying to understand how Natasha will get to know Peter better. Let’s all watch the Pete and Madi hype, BRB. They’re at a fishing village — no one wants to be on this date. That’s not a thing, and I’m from Florida. She’s wearing boots on the beach and Pete loves boats, cool.
I’m hearing Pete call Madi his best friend, and I got serious Colton Underwood vibes. But, then I recall the windmill. Maybe Peter is speaking in code? Pete and Madi hooked a fish, a big Kahuna, but let’s catch a connection on this one-on-one. Can we get the sun out of their eyes? We need some eye contact.
They’re good, very boring, but it’s sweet. Madison is reconfirmed, and Peter has validation that she’s there for him, and they’re on the same page. She wants him to be fully honest and open her heart up, but she can also see it ending if he isn’t receptive. Madi is very respectful to Pete so far and they have their faith in common. This is good, but Peter is lacking enthusiasm, personality and ultimately an explanation of where he’s at generally. Most boring date award goes to …
He just told Madi that he’s falling in love with her and she didn’t say it back right away. Maybe it’s just understood that she’s in love? This is cheesy and I’m not seeing the genuine chemistry. C’mon, guys, think about what love looks like — is this really it? Also could somebody explain to me how roses reproduce? Thanks ahead of time.
Madi is going to hometowns. I’m thinking this is good and feels safe.
Natasha’s One-on-One
Back at the house, the word “serious” is being seriously tossed around. Kelsey seems to really doubt everything, and I’m still not a Kelsey fan. For y’all’s clarity, I’m saying Kelley and Natasha will most likely be sent home tonight. However, we just found out that Natasha is getting a one-on-one, you go, girl!
Natasha calls what she and Pete have “a vibe.” Pete just said something about love but none of it stuck with me, so let’s see if Natasha is Pete’s lady! Side note: I love fair food, and I want all the onion rings! Pete said his time with Natasha is never dull, but what does that mean?
Kelsey is really bothering me back at the house during Natasha’s date. I get that you don’t want any other girl to come home after a date. Back to the one-on-one, Natasha has shown her personality more so than any other girl, Pete says. Good on her. Do you love her, though?
Pete knows how he feels about Madi and is comparing that relationship to his relationship with Natasha. Now he’s asking her where she’s at. She said she feels “safe” with him. There’s a lot of silence, and now she wants to know how he feels. I’m pretty sure he’s about to break up with her — there’s a sense of awkwardness and uncertainty.
There’s a lot of back and forth, and they aren’t really answering each other’s questions. This is just dragging me. He says he feels a “friendship” in a private interview, and now we know what’s coming for the first time this season. Natasha is being sent home and we’ve got time with Kelsey coming up. BTW, if Peter says “brutally honest” one more time, I’m turning this off. I can’t turn it off actually so I’ll just drink when he says it.
Kelsey’s One-on-One
We are down to five ladies. Oh, snap, y’all! There’s a three-on-one after Kelsey’s date. A three-on-one! A small, vicious group date. Is Kelley going to get into some drama? Let’s pour a glass of wine and see. Is anybody else slightly frustrated but also slightly defeated?
Pete’s scar is brutal, and we are riding four-wheelers today. This date is scenic. Outdoors are the best. Kelsey and Pete are climbing to the top — gotta get the viewpoint — so they can not look at each other. They’re lying together, and he’s asking what she envisions. She wants to be a mom, not a bad answer. I think that’s what he’s looking for. I try to be positive.
Kelsey will go to hometowns, I’m sure. Let’s give her a rose so she can bother us next week. Victoria F. is back at the house wondering why Kelsey’s bags haven’t been fetched yet.
Kelsey is literally tearing up just thinking about talking about family at the dinner portion. Pete says it’s nice to not get emotional on this date … little does he know. She’s about to cry, she has some issues involving her dad, and it’s about to get emotional. They have a relationship now, but her mom doesn’t know. So we’ve got a secret here … will a hometown visit disrupt this secret? I think so.
She’s learned a lot about what she doesn’t want, and she likes Peter. Pete held onto a light pole and kissed Kelsey. That was that.
Hannah Ann, Kelley and Victoria F.’s Three-on-One
Now we’ve got the three-on-one. I’m cheering for Hannah Ann. Unfortunately, Victoria F. will stick around too. Pete sent his Band-Aid home, and we just began the date. This date has no oomph to it, but Pete just grabbed Hannah Ann so here we go.
She doesn’t want to “say goodbye” to Pete. She’s sweet. He sees that she cares, and that’s all he needs — that vulnerability. Nice job, Hannah Ann. She even wrote down the reasons why she’s falling for him.
Also, these ladies need a stylist ASAP. Kelley is being very disrespectful to this process and way too sassy. She thinks she’s the only girl mature enough to be in a relationship. She wants to bring him home, but Pete isn’t feeling it. He wants more than fun. But, dating has to be fun at first, we all know that.
Victoria is now sitting with Peter — in silence — but now we are addressing doubts. This is so murky, and her attitude is awful. Victoria just called him moody, and she’s totally irritable. Already arguing? Maybe it’s time to send her packing.
This is stressful. Victoria acts like everything is an inconvenience, and Kelley is too full of herself. Poor Hannah Ann. Pete got rid of the night portion, and Kelley thinks he is sending Victoria home. He just walked her to the car and gave her a rose. So, Kelley, you were wrong. Lawyers aren’t always right. Is there an attorney at love? Or is that just like a divorce lawyer? My thoughts are unleashed.
Hannah Ann gets the rose for being a sweetie. I’m eating peanut butter and stress sweating, but Hannah Ann got it. She’s also crying her eyes out. Friendships are definitely made while filming.
Pete’s ending on a confident note, amen. Madi leads us in prayer to the next episode. All the girls have mad drama coming up, and I’m here for it. Hometowns may not go well. Safe travels to hometowns, cheers!
The season is winding down and the sand at Bachelor in Paradise is warming up. I need to narrate this coming up season. See y’all next week! I hope Pete stays on track and propels himself through the potential flight-delaying weather. The seatbelt sign is on and the drinks are not free.
The Bachelor airs at 8 p.m. Monday nights on ABC. You can learn all about Pete , get to know his gorgeous contestants , and if you can’t wait till the end of the season, you can see all the . Check back weekly for all of Jordan Kimball’s Bachelor guest blogs!
