Prepare for your heart to go on and on again, Titanic fans. There's a musical parody of the classic movie — that is hands down the greatest film of all time and no one can tell me otherwise — coming to New York City and hear me out when I say Titanique is already life-changing. Seriously, if you can fire off quotes from the 1997 epic movie like it's nobody's business and have spent many hours of your life watching Jack Dawson and Rose DeWitt Bukater fall in love despite knowing their romance sinks just like the Heart of the Ocean, this show is what your soul needs. And you can trust me, Titanic has been my go-to movie since I was like seven years old, so I'm basically an expert. Check out the video above to see a teaser trailer for Titanique.
So here's the rundown: the hilarious concert tells the story of Titanic through the perspective and music of the one and only Celine Dion. "My Heart Will Go On" might just be the true star of the movie when you think about it, so it's about time the diva gets her moment to shine. And if you're a Celine fan (who isn't, she's a LEGENDARY ICON) then this is truly the mash-up you've been waiting for. I mean, I would not have been opposed to Celine actually appearing in the movie as the most glam cruise ship singer and actually serenading Jack and Rose but you know, I'm glad she's getting the recognition she deserves for the impact she had on this movie and my life. Celine is the most extra all the time and that flair for the dramatics is going to be a gift to see in a tragic love story that is set in 1912.
Back to Titanique though. The show features Broadway star Marla Mindelle as Celine with total bae Constantine Rousouli — who you may recognize from Cruel Intentions: The Musical which we also saw and it was AMAZING — as Jack, and Alex Ellis as Rose. I have heard Constantine's insane vocal abilities IRL and I already have chills thinking of him taking on some of Queen Celine's jams. Oh, and did I mention he co-wrote Titanique too? Yeah, he's perfect and he's like super pretty too, so he might make me forget that Leonardo DiCaprio's version of Mr. Big Artiste Jack was a thing first. OK, I'm being dramatic because Leo as Jack Dawson is timeless and a girl can't forget her first celeb crush and all, but I have faith Constantine will slay.
The show will be making its NYC debut at The Green Room 42 for three days on August 25, 26 and 27 and since it had a sold-out run in Los Angeles, you know it's going to be a good time. Celine Dion literally inserts herself in Titanic, and tells us the story of Jack and Rose with songs from only her discography. All my favorite things in the world are coming together so obviously I won't even be as sad when the boat hits the iceberg this time around.