Once upon a time, you couldn't walk into a store, turn on a television, or open a magazine without seeing the Olsen twins staring back at you, two waifs gazing with their blue-green eyes and grins that said, "Join our fan club." That version of Mary-Kate and Ashley lives on in dolls and VHS covers everywhere, but these days the girls are so antisocial, their appearances read more like sightings…and they don't have a smile to spare for anyone. In fact, they don't seem to like anyone but themselves. In an interview with The New York Times, the businesswomen revealed that they don't online shop, but see one significant perk. "You don't have to deal with people," Ashley said. "That can be unpleasant," Mary-Kate added. "If you are going to deal with people, you have to make it a pleasant experience." Yikes.

The exchange is said with laughter, at least on Ashley's behalf, and yet I started to consider something: to the Olsens, hell is other people. I'm just unsure if it's because they're introverts born into the entertainment industry, or cynics irritated by the persistent gnats they call fans.

Though I write about Mary-Kate and Ashley on the regular, this seemed like a deeper study into Olsenology. Considering both angles, I looked into different facts and factors relating to the sisters' aloofness over the years. And all I can say is that whatever the cause, their reclusive habits definitely seem warranted.