Spill. The. Tea. Bachelor in Paradise star Clay Harbor revealed the moment that he “lost confidence” in his relationship with Nicole Lopez-Alvar on the beach in Mexico. The two made it all the way to the finale but broke up when the football player wouldn’t say that he was in love with her. During the aftershow, the Miami native accused him of leading her on and they have since been publicly taking jabs at each other. Clay tried to clear the air and tell his side of things in a candid post on Instagram on October 15.

“No, I will not be pressured into something as powerful as an engagement. Yes, I’m aware it’s accelerated but each relationship is different and I didn’t think mine made it far enough yet to be ready for that step,” he divulged in a written post on his Instagram Story. “You can’t force things and I came in hoping to find that.”

Clay Harbor Responds to Nicole Lopez Alvar Slamming Him Over Bachelor in Paradise Relationship
Courtesy of Clay Harbor Instagram

He then spilled some very interesting intel about a certain point in the season that he thought about leaving. “I honestly think I would have went home if not for the fight. (Thanks, Jordan),” he said, referring to the brawl between Jordan Kimball and Christian Estrada that happened during week 3. “After seeing what happened whenever someone else showed a little interest I lost a lot of confidence in my relationship and wanted the opportunity to see what would happen in real life so I’m sorry if that’s wrong.”

The reality stud’s response came after Nicole roasted him on social media a few days prior. After a fan called her a “moron,” she snapped back and claimed that Clay was “scared of commitment” and went on reality TV “for clout” in order to “get back into his failed NFL career.” She also added that “he never ever hit me up” after the show, alluding to when Clay previously stated that he was interested in dating after the show wrapped.

The Chicago resident also addressed why he never tried to contact Nicole after Mexico in his lengthy statement. “After finding out she had a boyfriend a couple of weeks after the show I decided not to,” he explained. “I was happy for her and didn’t want to intrude.”

Clay Harbor Responds to Nicole Lopez Alvar Slamming Him Over Bachelor in Paradise Relationship Slamming His Failed NFL Career
Courtesy of Clay Harbor Instagram

Not for nothing, Clay also mentioned that he is “extremely proud” about his football career, which he noted was “[three] times the average career length.”

As if all this drama wasn’t enough, the athlete also brought up his previous relationship with Angela Amezcua — the pair split before filming for Paradise began. “People break up. Everyone on the show has broken up otherwise they wouldn’t be on the show.”

Clay Harbor Responds to Nicole Lopez Alvar Slamming Him Over Bachelor in Paradise Relationship Angela Relationship
Courtesy of Clay Harbor Instagram

Clay’s exes are definitely a bit salty over the way he conducted himself throughout each relationship and both ladies have hinted at feeling blindsided when things fizzled out. “A big reason I decided to end things was not to waste her time or lead her on. (I was also told she wouldn’t be in Paradise but that’s another story),” he concluded.

One thing is for sure: The drama never seems to end in Bachelor Nation.