“I just have so much PTSD from what I went through as a teenager,” Paris, 42, told Romper in an interview published on Tuesday, December 5.
Paris has previously claimed that she was subjected to sexual and physical abuse at Utah’s Provo Canyon School when she was a teen. The school, which focuses on troubled youth, allegedly held her down and conducted nonconsensual gynecologic exams, she claimed in her YouTube documentary, This Is Paris, as well as her memoir.
“I cried while they held me down & said, ‘No!’ They just said, ‘Shut up. Be quiet. Stop struggling,’” Paris claimed in a post on X in October 2022.
The mom of two said that she still struggles in doctor’s offices due to the abuse and felt like that anxiety could be harmful to the baby if she were to carry a child herself.
“If I’m in a doctor’s office, I get a shot, anything, I will literally have a panic attack and I can’t breathe,” Paris said. “I just knew that would not be healthy for me or the baby, growing inside of someone who has such high anxiety.”
However, Paris also added that having a baby via surrogate worked better with her busy schedule.
“My schedule is out of control,” she confessed. “There never would’ve been the right time to do it because there’s literally no time to do anything in my life.”
The trauma she claimed to have endured in her teens is also what she says led to the partying lifestyle Paris was so well-known for in the late ‘90s and early 2000s.
“Going out at night would drown out my nightmares,” the Simple Life star recalled. “I know it’s weird to say I felt safe in the nightlife, but I did.”
Paris also reflected on how her mom and dad’s parenting style has shaped the way she plans to raise her children. She noted that she often rebelled against her parents’ strict rules and that’s why she wants to be more open with her own children.
“It’s really important to have your kids feel comfortable to tell you anything and feel like they’re not going to get in trouble,” Paris explained.
However, she then added, “I’m probably going to be really strict, too, because it’s a scary world out there, especially today. I’m just terrified when they become teenagers.”