Roses are red, violets are blue, I used to jerk off to the thought of you. That, ladies and gentlemen, is what we assume Ariana Grande‘s Valentine’s Day card will read this year. Romantic, right? On Sept. 24, Pete Davidson took to The Howard Stern Show to reveal that even before he began dating his bride-to-be, he was, er, touching himself to the idea of being with her.  

Sorry, y’all, there’s really no comfortable way of discussing this — so let’s just get into what Pete said about his fiancée, shall we? “Any time we’re intimate I’m always apologizing and saying thank you. ‘You’re awesome for doing this, thank you so much,'” the SNL star began, adding: “I get it. I was jerking off to her before I met her!” OK, so it’s not necessarily a Shakespearean sonnet, but we suppose that based on some backwards male logic… it’s kind of sweet. 

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To be fair, the 24-year-old isn’t always that crude when it comes to discussing his fiancée. In fact, speaking with Billboard earlier this year, Pete opened up about his relationship in a really beautiful way. “Some people are meant to be together and some people aren’t, even if they’re good people, some people are not good in relationships together,” he explained. “And I just think we’re supposed to be together.” How cute!

TBH, we have zero doubt that Pete wants to be with Ariana. After all, the poor guy has received death threats just because he’s involved with her — and you thought your relationship came with baggage. “I got a death threat!” Pete also revealed to Howard Stern. “Someone wanted to shoot me in the face… because [Ariana] is so hot. You know how insane that is?” he continued. “Am I that ugly that people want to shoot me in the face? They’re like, ‘no, f–k this guy,’ like what did I do?” No, Pete, you’re not ugly — we just think you should work on filtering yourself a little bit, that’s all! 

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