If you thought that killing off Mr. Big was the worst thing that could have come out of a third Sex and the City movie, you thought wrong. According to E! News, Kim Cattrall’s storyline for her beloved role as Samantha Jones would have been a fate far worse than death.

“Kim never wanted to really do the movie to begin with,” a source close to the failed project revealed to the outlet. “It was a combination of not great money and a bad storyline for Samantha.” OK, not gonna lie, y’all, “bad” is putting it *very* lightly.

Basically, Samantha’s “main storyline” would have focused on Miranda Hobbes’ now-14-year-old son, Brady, who has a proclivity for sending “dick pics” of his erect penis to Samantha. We’ll go ahead and let that sink in for a minute.

To be fair, Kim made it a clear nearly two years that she didn’t think SATC 3 would be worthwhile, but after this? We get it, girl! “I think the climate changed. To have four women talking about shopping trips and spending $400 on shoes when people are having trouble putting food on the table? It doesn’t mean we don’t need that but I think the pendulum swung in a different direction,” the actress told The Daily Record newspaper in 2016.

Sarah Jessica Parker, who plays Carrie Bradshaw, however, had a much different take after hearing the movie went caput. “It’s over…we’re not doing it,” she told Extra in 2017. “I’m disappointed. We had this beautiful, funny, heartbreaking, joyful, very relatable script and story. It’s not just disappointing that we don’t get to tell the story and have that experience, but more so for that audience that has been so vocal in wanting another movie.”

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As much as we’ll forever love the SATC franchise, we hardly think Samantha’s alleged storyline would have been seen as “joyful” or “relatable.” At the end of the day, perhaps it’s best that Carrie, Miranda, Samantha, and Charlotte said goodbye when they did. 

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