Reality redo! Amanda Stanton admits she “was a little anxious” when she found out ABC is re-airing Ben Higgins’ season of The Bachelor as part of its Greatest Seasons Ever series. “I never even watched it back then because I hate seeing [and] hearing myself on TV,” she exclusively tells Life & Style

The 30-year-old California native, who finished in the top four of season 20, plans to *finally* watch her first stint in the Bachelor franchise on June 22. “It was so long ago and I feel like I’ve grown so much since then. I do think it will be fun to watch it back though now,” the Lani the Label designer says.  

Bachelor Star Amanda Stanton Smiles With Daughters Kinsley and Charlie

Amanda adds “maybe” she’ll show her daughters, Kinsley and Charlie, “certain parts” of the episode. The young girls actually made an appearance — and met Ben — during their mom’s hometown date. Unfortunately, the contestant was eliminated during the following rose ceremony ahead of the finale in lieu of Lauren BushnellJoJo Fletcher and Caila Quinn

Although things didn’t work out with the Indiana native, 31, Amanda gushes she’s “so happy” for her ex and his engagement to Jessica Clarke. “I had the pleasure of meeting Jess at Ashley [Iaconetti] and Jared [Haibon]’s wedding, and she is a doll. Ben is such a sweet guy and deserves all the love and happiness!” the starlet adds. 

After appearing on season 20, Amanda tried her luck at finding love on the third season of Bachelor in Paradise. She left the beach engaged to Josh Murray, but they split shortly after

“Yeah, it was a huge mistake, public mistake that I felt like everyone was judging me on,” she reflected on Reality Steve’s podcast in 2017. “Which is really tough, but I kind of learned to forgive myself for it. Everyone makes mistakes. I learned a lot from it. If I could go back, I definitely wouldn’t have him move in so soon.”

The esthetician came back for the fourth season of Paradise where she struck up a romance with Robby Hayes. They took their breakup drama off-screen in a Twitter feud that ended with Amanda posting a picture of what appeared to be Robby cheating on her with another girl.

Despite a bit of heartbreak through the years, the Southern California babe is currently living her best life. She’s busy “designing [Lani the Label’s] fall and holiday collections and has over 1 million followers on social media.” As far as her love life, she’s keeping her options open

“I’m looking for someone positive, fun, confident, kind and intelligent! Sounds easy enough, right?” Amanda quips. “Also, someone that is OK with taking things slow! I don’t want to rush into anything and am hopeful my next relationship will be my last.”

Keep slaying, girl!

Reporting by Diana Cooper