<p><span></span>Three years after <strong>Chris Brown</strong> attacked<strong> Rihanna</strong>, the pop star is coming clean about her current feelings for her former flame.</p>
"He was the love of my life," Rihanna revealed to Oprah on Oprah's Next Chapter. "He was the first love, and I see that he loved me the same way."
"It's not even about us being together, I truly love him," she added. "The main thing for me is that he's at peace: I'm not at peace if he's not happy or lonely; it actually matters that he finds that peace."
In the episode that aired on Aug. 19 on OWN, Rihanna invited the famous talk- show host into her home in Barbados and gave the most candid interview to date about Chris, even admitting she "truly" loves him.
"It took me a long, long time.... I was dark, I was angry," she said about finally forgiving Chris after their violent altercation in February 2009. "It was coming out in my music, my clothes, my attitude, and I didn't like that feeling. It was heavy."
The 24-year-old, who sparked controversy this past February after featuring Chris on her song "Birthday Cake" and being featured on his track "Turn Up the Music," says she and Chris worked hard to get where they are.
"Now we're very, very close friends," Rihanna confided to Oprah. "We built a trust again, and that's it. We love each other, and we probably always will, and that's not something we're ever going to try to change, that's not something that you can shut off, if you've ever been in love."
As for the duo reconnecting in St. Tropez earlier this year? Rihanna confirms that she and Chris spent time together on a mutual friend's yacht -- and that it's never easy seeing him.
"It's awkward," she said. "My stomach drops, and I have to maintain this poker face.... When you don't understand those feelings, you can make a lot of mistakes."
Photo Credit: Splash
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